Living on $100 for 10 days

In an effort to blog more this year, I am sharing what I am thinking and doing in life (for the first, see Seven Layer Dip for Super Bowl Sunday), so to continue, I have set another challenge for myself: to live on $100 for 10 straight days.

Why?  Well, it is a challenge, and who does not like a good challenge?  But in all seriousness, I would like to try as hard as I possibly can (for just 10 days, mind you) to save for a 10 day trip I have planned in two months.

Basically, I am sacrificing 10 days of living in DC now to save for 10 days in the future, where I will enjoy beautiful, sunny California and the red rocks of Sedona.  It is a pretty good trade-off, don't you think?  Plus, it gives me something interesting to do for 10 days as well as something interesting to blog about.  Are we not here to make things in life interesting?

So here is my plan: starting on Monday, February 4 (the day after the Super Bowl), I will live on $100 for ten straight days.  I will chronicle each day of my challenge as well as share how I have spent the money pictured above.

Although I begin this challenge with a refrigerator and pantry full of groceries, I would have done that anyway, so relax.  The underlying feature to this challenge is to share how I live for 10 days--in an effort to be very conscious about what I spend so I save for my trip out west.  I am sure you have all done something similar, and living on $100 in 10 days might seem like a luxury?  I will save you the details about how it really is not a luxury and more of a challenge because the cost of living in DC is a bit higher than other cities in the USA...

So, my dear readers, have I interested you in following me on this challenge?  If not, I will add another layer of my challenge to entice you just a bit more...

I am also currently working on a painting, which will cover this massive canvas I found by my apartment complex's dumpster one afternoon (along with a gallon bucket of Gesso - win!).  This canvas once had a painting of a very awkwardly-looking naked person (yeah - I wish I had a picture of it, too), but I recently used the massive bucket of Gesso to paint over that ugly thing of a portrait.  

I have made some really good progress so far, and as you know, painting in my apartment is an incredibly cost-effective way of spending my nights and weekends, and it is perfect timing for this 10 day challenge.  So, with each new post for my "Living on $100 for 10 days" challenge, I will also provide a pictorial update of the painting's progress, with the hope of finishing it by February 13 (Day 10 of the challenge).  To catch you up on the progress thus far, which has occurred in the last 30 days, here are a few pictures:

On Monday night, visit The Dandygram again to read the first of a 10-post series on "Living on $100 for 10 days!"  Now go, enjoy your weekend and the Super Bowl, and of course, root for those San Francisco 49ers!!

Seven Layer Dip for Super Bowl Sunday 2013

For Super Bowl Sunday, I am determined to make the best Seven Layer Dip my friends have ever had, so I scoured websites for a while, read comments about the adjustments people suggested, and I have come up with a damn good recipe, which will also incorporate numerous techniques from the comments below (just like a Peyton Manning audible!).  

Servings

• 9x13 inch serving tray
• 2 pounds ground beef
• One package of taco seasoning
• 2 (16 ounce) can refried beans
• 4 cups shredded Cheddar-Monterey Jack cheese blend
• 1 (16 ounce) container sour cream
• 2 cup guacamole
• 2 cup salsa
• 1 (2.25 ounce) can black olives, chopped
• 1 cup chopped tomatoes
• 1 cup chopped green onions

Directions

In a large skillet, brown ground beef. Set aside to drain and cool to room temperature.  Add one package of taco seasoning and a half cup of water and mix, with heating, until meat is coated.

Then, make these seven layers:

1. Spread the beans into the bottom of a 9x13 inch serving tray that is about 1 1/2 inches deep.
2. Sprinkle 2 cups of shredded cheese on top of beans.
3. Sprinkle beef on top of cheese.
4. Spread sour cream very slowly on top of beef.
5. Spread guacamole on top of sour cream.
6. Pour salsa over guacamole and spread evenly.
7. Sprinkle remaining shredded cheese, black olives, tomatoes, and green onions on top.

Serve this dish immediately, or refrigerate it over night and serve cold. I think it tastes better at room temperature.

Comments for considerable improvements:

“Brown your beef with a packet of taco seasoning (no water), 1.5 tbs of cumin, 1 tsp of chili powder 1 tsp of garlic and 2 tbs of dried minced onion. Added finely chopped cilantro with the black olives, tomatoes and green onions. Mixture of pepperjack and cheddar cheese gave the dip more complexity than straight cheddar! Superb flavor!!!”

“I substituted cream cheese for half of the sour cream, used a packet of taco seasoning in the beef, and another packet in the sour cream / cream cheese mixture. A half cup or so of canned sliced jalapenos as layer #8 makes this a lot better. If you like guacamole, use about twice as much, because the recommended amount isn't enough to even spread out to make a whole layer.”

“I omitted the guacamole and upped the sour cream to 16 oz. Added 2 TBS of taco seasoning to sour cream. Thanks!”

“Apply the meat while its still hot so it melts into the first cheese layer and really meshes. I also agree that seasoning the meat is the best way to go whether it be with taco seasoning or your own personal spices. Only other thing I love to do is to take all the veggies (tomatoes, olives, and green onions) and dice together well to create a beautiful and tasty mixed layer. You can either take it and apply it on top as instructed or what I like to do sometimes is whisk it into the sour cream to create a more creamy vegetable layer to use underneath top top cheese layer.”

--

I hope this Dandygram helps all the other people looking to bring the best dish you can possibly bring to a Super Bowl Party, but more importantly, I've been getting the bug to blog again (as well as being bugged), so this is just a preview for what's in store for 2013.  

Oh, and I've been painting a lot more lately.  And I am back on Twitter (@trevorsparks).  So there's that.  

Futile subtleties? I 'hope' not.

Since moving to DC - the undisputed epicenter of U.S. politics - I would be remiss if I didn't send a follow-up to my 2008 election-season email, which if you remember, was a simple effort to encourage the recipients to go out and vote, and not particularly one way or another, but just to exercise their right to vote.  

I did that for a variety of reasons, but mostly, I sent that email because for six years prior to sending it, I defended (and now, so does my sister Erin) our right to vote.  I am fairly certain none of you need(ed) convincing from me, but I would be ashamed to know that you did not exercise that right in 2008, so please don't let me down next Tuesday.

For my follow up this year (and what an incredible year it has been!), I'd like to preface it by first stating that I sincerely understand and truly support the difference in opinions going into this upcoming election.  Sure, that probably sounds all fine and dandy, but let me explain why..

In the last four years, I've talked with so many of you about politics--local, state, federal and international--and what I've found to be most common during the election season is that people can't understand why someone would vote as a conservative (for Romney) or as a liberal (for Obama) if there isn't a resounding reason for doing so. 

Now I'll admit, I'm a registered Independent, which basically means I vote issue by issue, candidate by candidate, and I don't proscribe to party politics.  If I was registered to vote in a state, however, I'd give up my right to vote in the primaries, but in DC, we don't vote in primary elections, so registering as an Independent is safe (and smart).  Otherwise, I would truly be giving up some of the benefits of voting, which I will never do.

Your voice is true power, and in U.S. politics, your vote--at the minimum--is your voice.

Anyway, getting back to my original point.  The single greatest reason why so many people agree to disagree during the general election season is because they can't seem to figure out why people would vote for their candidate.  Why?  It is because people just don't want to take time to listen to the reasons why someone would vote for the opposition.  That is basically it, and that, to me, is the sign of an ignorant voter.  

As I stated above, "I sincerely understand and truly support the difference in opinions going into this upcoming election."  Well, I still do, but what I didn't say was that comes with a caveat because I can only "sincerely understand and truly support the difference in opinions" when you express them.

Personally, I wouldn't want to vote knowing I hadn't heard from those closest to me about how they will vote.  Granted, I don't need to be convinced to vote, duh.  But, I would be delighted to learn more about why you think your candidate would make the better president.  

Call me undecided.  Call me easily persuaded.  I tell you what I call it: Being open until calling it actually counts: Election Day 2012.  

That's the day you make the decision.  Up until that point, be an open book!  And like they say, don't judge a book by its cover, so be willing to hear arguments.  Be willing to listen to complaints.  Make the candidates work for your vote because once they get it, it's a whole different story.  

Your vote puts them where they need to be to carry through on their promises (or not), so make sure you get all the information before you cast your coveted vote.

Most importantly, be willing to listen to reason.  

To that point, I recently came across an interesting source for why people will be voting for Obama.  Take it with a grain of salt (salt takers, see #43 and #61), but I think you'll each find someone you relate to from the 80+ people listed on the website, "90 Days, 90 Reasons," which can be found here:

http://90days90reasons.com/index.php

Without going into detail about the site (it really is self-explanatory), I will say that more than 80 people have publicly stated on this website their reason for voting for Obama.  

The simple thought of this website will be something many of you overlook, cast aside or just plain scoff at, but I urge each of you to take a moment to peruse the names and find someone you recognize, respect and/or relate to, read their reason and then draw your own conclusion.  By doing that, you've at least acknowledged my ask for 2012: Don't just vote, educate yourself on the issues, the candidates and why people you love, respect and admire vote the way they do.  Then vote.  

Get educated, get registered and go vote.  In that order.  Please.

Signed,

Trevor Sparks

P.S.  For all you Obama supporters, I suggest using a friendly and fun website as your ammo in the days to come.  It can be found here.

Making East Coast Friends...

I moved to the East Coast six months ago, and since arriving, I've spent most of my free time making new friends.  It's what I do.  I go out.  I network.  I meet people.  I introduce myself to complete strangers.  I become new friends with my friends' friends.  Heck, I even joined a kickball team, and of course, I go to the happy hours.  You get the point..

From all this social activity, I've honestly and proudly made friends with other twenty-somethings who have also settled and now live in DC.  These new friends hail from the Midwest, the Southwest, the South and even from so far as the West Coast (all places I've also lived), but also those who have been here from the beginning--and are still here--the "East Coasters."  This bunch, however, has been the most difficult to befriend, but why?

Without a doubt, the East Coasters maintain an "air of reservation," which I have come to understand.  Perhaps, East Coasters might lack some trust for those of us who subscribed to Manifest Destiny (but there is something to be said about the fact we all say "go back East" and "head out West").  The simple fact that East Coasters are the most difficult of all Americans to warm up to and befriend, from my experience, unequivocally stems from the reasons derived from these observations:

First, East Coasters are more reserved.  They let on much less (and a lot less at first) to new people, friends and strangers.  Therefore, it takes longer to really get to know them, and they also reserve much more about who they are, what they do and who they know.  Maybe this is because they have larger and more numerous circles of friends, but it might also have to do with old money: how far back their families go into America's history and how politically, socially, and/or financially connected their namesake might be (and don't even begin to ask about their family's coat of arms).  Nevertheless, those who have lived on the East Coast their whole lives, along with their parents, grandparents, and their grandparents' parents (who were probably Pilgrims) just don't warm up very easily.  I've even experienced this with women dating back to my very first girlfriend in high school (who was from Middletown, NY) to the more recent pursuit with a wonderful East Coast woman.  I've also experienced this with new East Coast guy friends who look at me strangely when I make commitments early, easily, or tell them I can do this or that without thinking through it all for more than a moment.  It's fair I get those looks from my East Coast buddies, and to be honest, West Coasters are synonymous with flakiness.  This I know.

Second, East Coasters are just busier, and their busyness largely results from allowing an insurmountable amount of nightly and weekly events onto their plates (which I have also started to do..).  Yet, it also has to do with making decisions about where they go and what they do in their free time a bit more carefully.  From what I've collected in the last six months, it takes a lot more vetting from an East Coaster before they commit to (let alone attend) an event, get-together, happy hour, etc.  Trust me, I've tried them on all fronts--from happy hours to fundraisers, dinners to visiting local art galleries.  It just takes more persistance, more eagerness, and you must always be honest with them, both about what to expect, but more importantly, who will be there.  East Coasters will always fulfill their commitments, which is in stark contrast to West Coasters (sorry, I had to go there), but it also takes a lot more to get their commitment.  In DC, this is more of a commonality than anywhere else because, (I mean, come on) it's DC, so you never know who's going to be out where you're going or who that stranger might know--about you, your organization, your boss or your coworkers while you're out doing your thing.  Thus, East Coasters are more reserved (see #1 above).

Third, East Coasters are more selective, but please, allow me to explain this before my East Coast friends take offense.  By this point, I simply mean that East Coasters allow a much smaller spectrum of West Coast's (et al.) fashion, style, dialects, lingo, slang, and demeanor into their diaspora.  Although the East Coast can stake their claim in the moon of style and fashion (Manhattan), and the various movements across the nation either spur from the East Coast or just plainly do not survive (read: Ed Hardy and tribal  tattoos).  Basically, most of what bleeds TMZ is really a recipe for disaster amongst the East Coast high crust/brow.  As well, East Coasters' appreciation for tradition (but not traditional), and their preservation of continuity is instrumental to their selectivity, which exists.

Fourth and finally, East Coasters have more depth.  I know I'll catch a lot of shit from some Cali friends about this, but if you read this post, you'll understand my claim..  In no specific order, East Coasters create better invitations, write more meaningful emails, leave lengthier voicemails, entertain thoughts longer, delve deeper into the emotions one feels, stay out later or longer (and to make sure you're home safe), tell you their thoughts without sacrificing their emotions, and they get straight to the point on matters.  Does this all come from their mutual concern for not letting on to others as easily and being more selective?  I think that truly plays a big part, but I also think that this nation has a melting pot of truly different people who are a conglomerate of their whereabouts.

In conclusion, I've merely tried to note a few of the qualitative differences between the people I've grown to know from living in the different parts of the nation.  My basic premise was that East Coasters have been the most difficult to befriend, and this feeling hasn't changed in the course of writing this post, but one thing is for sure, the sustainability of friendship with the few East Coasters I have made (and cherish) are unprecedented friendships.  They've not been fair-weather friends, they've given the best advice, and they've truly been there.

Night and day, I'm becoming more and more an East Coaster: more reserved, busier, more selective, and a deeper human being.  I've also been committing more of myself to the relationships I currently have (both here and afar), creating lasting friendships but also making inroads for a way of life that might soon proscribe to what's above.  However, I can only culminate as an East Coaster from my upbringing in the Midwest (Indiana), Southwest (Arizona), the South (Texas), and the West Coast (California), but never in spite of this whatsoever...

...who can relate?

For the Sake of Men this Movember.

It's not uncommon that I support causes.  It's also not uncommon that I've joined causes, ones that are bigger than myself and claim the lives of others.  So you shouldn't be surprised to read this Dandygram about what the next one is all about...

Moustache Season--better known as Movember--is upon us, and you all can be damn sure I've registered myself this year.  In fact, I've gotten other great guys and gals to register for Movember where we'll embrace the hair of the wild.

Basically, I've pledged to cultivate a genuine, 100% face grown moustache for the entire month of November.  Why, you ask?  To raise awareness and funds for men's health, specifically cancers affecting men.  To start this month, I have sent emails to my DC Mo Bros, Mo Sistas, and am now dedicating this Dandygram to it, too.  More importantly, I would like to ask you, my trusty and fearless readers, to join me by signing up or donating or growing a moustache or being a Mo Sista or just simply encouraging the men in your life to think about our health.  Together, we can change the face of men's health and do it in a thoughtful, fun way.  

Before I get more into what the Movember movement is all about, here are some cold, hard facts and a very personal story to put my involvement into better context:

Did you know that 1 in 6 American men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer in their lifetime?  True story.  Also, 1 in 2 men will be diagnosed with cancer in their lifetime.  Thirteen million adult men over the age of 20 in the United States have diabetes--and a third don't even know it.  One in eight men who suffer from mental illness actually seek help, and finally, a third of the 571,950 cancer deaths expected to occur in 2011 will be related to obesity, physical inactivity, poor nutrition and thus could be prevented.  Those are just the cold, hard facts of the matter.  Now, here is my personal story and the reason for my involvement this particular year:

During August 2011, my stepdad was diagnosed with prostate cancer.  He became one of the six who get diagnosed.  After a colonoscopy, a tumor was detected--and buried--in the transverse (horizontal) section of his colon and very close to his spleen.  Ligaments hold the colon in place there, so the doctor had to cut out a major part of that section and re-attach the pieces.  In all, he had about 14 inches removed from his lower intestine and now has a gnarly scar.  Presently, he is days away from going in for a second opinion to discover whether he will undergo chemotherapy.  He is just one.  One story of the millions of affected men, but he's the one that has made this month personal for me.

My dear readers - as more people (men and women both) become involved in Movember, more lives will be impacted.  It's plain and simple, but with a hairy twist!  Guys (Mo Bros): start growing your moustaches today, and tomorrow, make a statement, provoke conversation in the workplace, talk with your friends, call your doctor for a check up, style it for Thanksgiving over the turkey and dumplings, smile while riding your bike or in the coffee shop or everywhere.  For the sake of men, be healthy.  Gals (Mo Sistas): support your guys this month as they grow out a moustache, smile about the irritation from the fact we're growing moustaches, encourage us to visit our doctors and get ourselves checked out, make healthy meals with us, and remember, the moustache will be gone on December 1.

Here are the rules, and it's not too late to participate:

Now, if you truly want to take part in what I've joined (along with my friends) and start raising money for men's health, then get registered with DC Moustachery here (it's FREE and no moustache growing is required...that means you Mo Sistas!).  With that done, Movember will send you all the information you need to start raising awareness and funds on your own or with us for men's health.  We've had a good first two days -- $110 for the cause! -- but that's just the tip of the iceberg (or should I say the stubble above our upper lips) for Movember, DC Moustachery and men's health!

If you would like to participate, but don't want to register or grow a moustache, you can always donate directly to our cause by typing in "Trevor Sparks" here or "DC Moustachery" here.  All proceeds go to the cause, not me.  I promise, and it's really that simple, but honestly, more than your money and new Movember moustaches, I want you all to know it's cooler than cool to be healthy.  I just rock a moustache as a reminder (pictures and a Moustache Party coming soon!).

Movember will now forever be a part of my future Novembers, and as your friend, I ask that you please take a stand with me too.  It only takes one to make a difference, but working together, we can make and do so much more.  I leave you with a moustache style guide:

[I feel like] This is long overdue.

My dear readers: I am so sorry for such a delay in posting Dandygrams.  Life has really been delivering for the last two months.  Nevertheless, I presently have a few minutes to catch my breath and write (along with sincere encouragement from Janou), so I would like to address a few things that have been on my mind lately.  Here it goes..

First and foremost, let's get something very clear: there is a significant difference between a compliment and flattery.  To be sure, it took me years to really get this figured out, but I have learned.  I would like to give a lot of credit to my dear friend Megha for explaining it to me so eloquently.  

Here's the deal (gentlemen and aspiring Dandies take note): Flattery is not a compliment, and there is a very important distinction between flattery and compliments.  Compliments are sincere and well-deserved.  Flattery, by definition, is "excessive and insincere praise, especially that given to further one's own interests."  An example here would be good:  You have beautiful eyes.  Wow.  Good line sweet talker!  I mean, if you want the pretty lady to say, "I'm so flattered," then you've done well.  If you want her to say thank you, compliment her on something in her control:  You look beautiful tonight (or) That is an amazing dress.  These are the type of things women have in their control.  

As Megha would explain, our parents and genetic code give us our eyes, so we really have no choice in the matter or how they look.  Our style or our appearance, however, is something we control and this deserves admiration.  So gentlemen, bite your tongues for a second and think of a better line that would compliment women because it means so much more than flattery.  Not only that, compliments don't come across as cheesy, and of course, women know the difference.

Now to the second thing that's been on my mind, and this one shoots to the core of so much that is being said in conversation these days.  I've blogged before about how certain aspects of my generation have encompassed the ability for many to communicate effectively, such as the way text messaging has shortened our sentences and abbreviated our feelings or how nobody sends postcards, writes letters or mail thank you cards anymore.  Well, here's yet another downfall to our communication abilities and it's stacked right up there with the rest of them.  

[I feel like] people should know about this.  [I feel like] it's important to share.  [I feel like] there are a lot people always saying 'I feel like' for no good reason at all.

I have no doubt you are each rapidly catching on to my observation since 'I feel like' is EVERYWHERE, but WHY?  That dumb prefacing phrase has no real purpose in conversation.  It's simply a subtle way to insert indetermination.  As if our generation doesn't have enough of that already.  Basically, it is just more indecision for my already indecisive generation.  

Here's my suggestion: just get your feelings and opinions out there without fear you might be wrong, judged or questioned for what you're saying.  While those things do happen and sometimes we get called on misspeaking or improperly verbalizing our ideas, we're humans and humans are prone to error.  Whenever 'I feel like' is said, it's just a way of interject a prepositional phrase to what you are already going to say, which is based on what you feel and the listener is obviously aware of this once you say it.  

That said, it's now time to go out and PLAY!

In No Specific Order: Taking a Moment for the Brain, Heart, and Soul

Let's be honest: it is so damn easy to be consumed by things in our daily life that constantly draw our attention away from what really, truly matters.  It happens, we're all victims of this, and it's inevitable.  However, we can thank goodness for the hearts and minds of three special women: Rachel Sparks-Graeser, Leslie Cunningham, and Hailey Wist.  Why these three women, you ask?  Let me explain...

Two years ago, my cousin Rachel's life forever changed after she had moved to New York City and learned that children were being sold into prostitution all over the world. No longer content to live as she had been, she began wrestling with how to get involved. The result?  The SOLD Project.

Last year, my cousin Leslie took on a challenge to provide mothers--of young and old children alike--a photographic reflection about giving birth.  She combined her powerful, literary eye for the joys and surprises of motherhood along with her talented understanding for the media driven concept of feminine beauty to please and strike home a cause that is common for all women who have walked into the circle of motherhood.  From her dedication to #goodness came The Afterbelly.

This year, my friend Hailey (whom I would say is an Alice Waters protégé) invited four suburbanites to grow a summer garden in rural Arkansas.  During this time, they discovered the forgotten satisfaction of digging in the dirt and porch sitting with neighbors. They ate within a 100-mile radius, sold their goods at a local farmers market, and gained (or deeply instilled) their compassion for sustainability.  Hailey's spark birthed The Garden Summer. 

Please, take a moment outside of yourself to fill your brain, heart, and soul with the amazing and powerful work of these three incredible women.